Life is a journey, one step at a time.

2004-04-21

Yesterday during my ultra sound, my cervix measured 1.8 cm.

The 'danger zone' as my dr puts it is at 2.5 cm.

So I'm on bed rest.

I can't believe it. I can't believe that I have to physically lay here at home for weeks on end. But on the other hand, when I look at my ruler, I can't believe that that little tiny measurement is holding my baby in.

So I will lay. I don't want to risk losing the baby. I would feel horrible since I know what to do and I know the concequences if I don't do as I'm told.

E says to make the best of it. Lay around, sleep (his favorite past time!) read, watch tv, what a vacation! And hopefully disability will kick in and I'll get paid to do it.

How boring!!

I'm not even supposed to be on the computer but I'm reclining as best as I can. Do you know how hard it is to lay on your back with the key board on you belly and type that way? E will ask his work about borrowing a laptop computer today and if he can't get one he will move my computer into the tv room.

I can get up for about 40 minutes three times a day, enough to eat, shower and I can go to the bathroom when I need to but no more than that. I need to lay down.

I just need to focus on not getting bored! I think it will be easy at first, but as the days and weeks roll on by, it will get harder. My dr said that by the end of this I'll be crazy. I laughed, she didn't. I called my mom and she is coming by today. I'll even break down and call my step-mom as she doesn't work either and maybe convince her to bring some craft stuff. I also can study for my x-ray board exam and sneak to take it. Maybe E will take me and I can lay in the back seat on the way there and back.

See, everything will come together. I just have to remain positive and remember that this is all for my sweet little boy.