2003-09-27
Weigh in day � 210.0! Whoo hoo!! It's a week past my goal, but I am here! I�m pretty shocked and excited. My eating hasn�t been that great, but I did walk the lake three times this week. I even went by myself on Thursday; I just put on my little radio and walked. I felt so good when I was finished.E has been pointing out changes in my body, my double chin is almost all the way gone, my shoulders are more squared, upper arms are smaller, and my forearms are dainty. My back isn�t so round, and my butt�let�s just say he can�t keep his hands off it! I must say it does look shapelier. (Hah, finally!) And my legs have less fat on them, when he touches them he can feel muscle.
I have been noticing a different kind of changes, like how my feet don�t hurt as much at the end of the day, even after I walk the lake, and my back isn�t killing me any more. I actually ran up some stairs the other day and my knee didn�t grind and feel as if it would give out. I can squeeze between two people talking in the hallway and not brush up against either one of them. I can hop up and sit on the counter at work. All these little changes make me want to stay on course. It makes me feel so much better about myself right now. I have so much more confidence, and feel so much more feminine.
The feminine part is something I will have to work at. For so long, I have been putting a tomboyish shell around myself because I have always felt I looked stupid dressed up in pretty clothes, with my hair and makeup fixed. I always longed for the pretty, girly side of life, but felt awkward. As if people would see me and say �Who is she trying to fool, she looks like a dressed up pig.� I always felt I should be tough and sturdy, and in some way I like to be that way. I enjoy being outside, hiking and fishing, digging around in the dirt. But I also want to be pretty and soft and sweet and sexy and girly. I feel all that stirring inside me, trying to push out. But can the two ways mix? I guess I�ll find out.
Food: Haven�t eaten anything yet.
Well, I�m off to start my day. It�s going to be long since we will be house hunting. There is one that we may want, but we need to see the inside. I�ve been told that it needs some work. Hah! I know what that means!
Have a great weekend!